Another Probation Report Day

"Road to Riches" "Money, Power, Respect", "Criminal", "Get rich or die trying", "Ready to Die", "AmeriKKa's most WANTED", "Don't watch me, watch TV". These were not the new lobby signs at the probation office. These snappy phrases were printed on the jacket of the man that signed in before Carl. He put on his matching cap as he took a seat.

The female guard made me walk through the metal detector three times, I had an extra pack of cigarettes in my side pocket it turns out. She made a "tsk" sound each time that I walked through. She always makes that face; it's as if she draws her eyebrows on unevenly every morning around the large mole on her forehead. Her eyebrows tumble around on her face like two carp fighting over a peice of corn. Maybe this is a new occupational hazard: Shifty Eyebrow Syndrome.

My PO, Mr. L---, called me in. "How's the jet lag coming along, Carl?" he asked. I told him I think I've settled on Pacific Standard Time. He laughed, and said "Now you're three hours behind." He told me that his trip to China offset his sleep for about a month. That seems about right. Ver Klempt himself is still in Shanghai, he'll soon return to King County. He'll be going through the lag himself. He might bring back third world snacks with names like Monkeypaw Jerked Meat or Jellyfish Health Leather. I noticed the neighborhood blog has learned about our covert operation.

At this point in time, I no longer get up at 4:00 am looking for dinner, but I still have to take a late afternoon nap. Mr. L--- looked over my record and told me I was almost done with Anger Mangement. "Graduation Day, April 10" I said. I didn't make a crack about the diploma with the unhappy face seal. He is a nice man, but he is still "the man". Community Service is reaching it's end too, ETA three weekends. Soon I'll start teaching gardening to children in spring, my real community service job.

I posed two probation-related situations to Mr. L---. I have to plan for my father's death anniversary next year. I still miss him and think of him often. I also have a potential shot at becoming a spokesman for a series of craft DVDs (keyword is potential). He said as long as I can give him a scheduled date, neither would be a problem.

NOTE: Next Probation Report day March 28. Mid-afternoon home visit this week Thursday, March 16.